Being real no matter what

In one book I read in my youth, it was said that before to give what you want, life usually gives the opposite to make sure that your desire is real. And this not only helps you to confirm your readiness, but also gives you a contrast, feeling which you appreciate what you have gained more.

Life is like that – it gives you what you want only when you are ready to receive it. Because when you are not ready – you pass by and do not notice the opportunities that are right in front of your eyes.

Today I talked to my friends and they were all happy that we decided to turn our lives around 180 degrees. It’s so wonderful when your close people are on the same waves with you.

I think I should imagine nicknames, because soon there will be many different names with the same first letter.

I miss Abra, he is leaving for Canada and I don’t know when I will see him again. He brought a lot of warmth and understanding to my life, I am happy that he is my friend.
Also I really want to see Alex, I haven’t seen him for several years. I hope someday we will spend a week in Amsterdam, as we dreamed for a long time.
And I so miss my little E.

I continue to write three pages every morning and feel how it changes my life. I want to tell about this experience separately, but here I will only say that most of the key events that have happened recently – happened during those 12 days that I write my morning pages.

Today I continued to work on the Co-Uplifting, improved the websites, processed images, went to the store and cooked. I made wraps with vegetables and tofu – the food here has an unusual taste for me, so it was a bit strange. M. said it was delicious, and since I cooked for her, I am satisfied.

When I was cycling around Adelsdorf I noticed how amazing the sky was today. It is a beautiful village, and there are beautiful neat houses and streets. However, I don’t feel like I belong to here. There is nothing wrong with Adelsdorf – it is a good place to live. And I am fine – it is normal to want to live in a country that is closer to your spirit and soul. But I am grateful for all the experiences and wonderful people I have met here. Especially for the great P.

I’m going to bed late again tonight, not because I haven’t finished anything, but because it’s a bad habit – it’s time to change my routine. It really is.

I want to live a vulnerable, open and honest life, and I want to be real no matter what.

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